A few years ago, we were hired to produce Roy Firestone as the headliner entertainment for a gala benefiting the Arnold Palmer Hospital for Women and Children in Orlando, Florida. We actually ended up reprising our role as producer for Mr. Palmer three years running. But that’s not the story.
I had just arrived at the Orlando Airport and picked up my rent car to drive to Bay Hill Country Club – Arnold’s home course and the current location of the Arnold Palmer Invitational. I was to play golf that day with my main contact with the event – a lifelong friend of Mr. Palmer’s. Somehow, I got turned around going the opposite direction from Bay Hill. I was winging my way down the highway for 30 minutes before I realized I was headed for the Kennedy Space Center. There were no exits as it is a type of toll road.
Finally, I found a small store, stopped and used the pay phone. I had left my cell phone in Austin by mistake. I called the golf shop at Bay Hill to tell them of my mistake and that I would be a little late for our golf round. The pro at Bay Hill said, “Well, don’t kill yourself getting here but you’re playing golf with Arnold Palmer today”. I almost passed out. I jumped in the car, raced down the highway the right way, screeched in to the parking lot at Bay Hill, jumped in a golf cart, threw on my golf shoes and was taken to the 2nd hole. The group had already played the 1st hole.
Arnold and the others had already hit their tee shots to a difficult and long, uphill par 3. I went to the tee and they all watched. I did not hit one warm up ball. I remember saying out loud…”I’m at Bay Hill about to tee off in front of Arnold Palmer with no practice and my hair is on fire”. Then, I had an out of body experience. Floating above my person, I saw myself take the 3 iron back, eyes rolling over in my sockets, forgetting 30 years of golf lessons and hit the ball. It felt like I hit a rock. By some miracle, though, I was the only person to hit the green. Mr. Palmer said, “Nice shot John”. Can you spell “Heaven”? It gets better.
Mr. Palmer has a habit of walking right down the fairway after he hits his next shot even though there are players behind him ready to hit their next shot. I don’t think he does it on purpose. I believe he can’t fathom any one with a golf game so rotten that they might hit him in the back or head. Now, I had hit a few bladed shots that day being nervous and all. As I stood over the ball – with Arnold Palmer in front of me some 50 yards – I thought to myself…”I am going to kill Arnold Palmer. Every golfer in the world will hunt me down. I will be the pariah of golf for generations”.
Now, I did have my “go to” shot which was a fade. So, I decided to play a really BIG fade taking the ball well to the left of Mr. Palmer and watching it come back well in front of the legend. All this worked well even though I was hyperventilating after each shot. Ultimately, though, I came upon my ball in the sand trap next to the green. It was a deep trap with virtually no green to work with. Mr. Palmer was standing right next to the pin. Those who know me know full well that I am not the greatest sand player. When I miss the shot, it is a bladed rocket coming out at warp speed. This was not a shot I could bull my way through. So, I said to Mr. Palmer…”This isn’t my best shot. You may want to back up a bit”. Arnold moon walked in the opposite direction of the pin. Yet another miracle occurred when I hit a lovely flop shot right next to the pin.
Roy Firestone, whom I was to produce that night, is a fabulous guy. He is multi-talented as a singer, informal comic and impressionist beyond his legendary sports broadcast career. Being a huge Arnold Palmer fan, Roy produced an unbelievable video of Arnold’s highlights for the show that night. You could hear a pin drop followed by a lot of sobbing followed by an uproar of shouting and clapping.
Not only did I produce a great headliner – I got to play golf with and around Arnold Palmer. It doesn’t get any better than that.
